Crit Feedback:

Overall, this year's standard of work was very high; I was super excited to watch so many diverse ideas with noticeable improvements from the previous years.

Feedback for my main projects

The White Nightgown:

I was most nervous about this project, noticing that most of the crew were disappointed in how it turned out, which was quite disheartening; however, I did agree with a lot of the feedback and felt like our work was received considerably better than expected.

Notes from feedback:

Susan

-Ambitious to take on a costume drama

-Story arc works well

-Archaic language struggled a bit with the language barrier

-Revelation of what happened to the protagonist comes well

-Editing around the door works well, considering the limited courage

-The end conversation that he is profiting from her death is revealed well.

-Exterior shot of crows added well to the tone and set up, providing more information to start speculating about what happened, more observant

Andrew

- Overall, it was well achieved, for the most part, apart from some door handle modern slip-ups in set design.

- Good depth in frames and consistency in images

- The costumes were well executed

- Blocking-wise, going up the stairs drama and the two-shot works kinda of when she's hanging over but needing something in between for when he's stuck on the stairs, need to be in the same space to feel more connected emotionally to him, as it felt a bit awkward.

- More close-ups, the wide and medium shots are well constructed, but during the call out, we need to be closer to her to match the scene's tension. Performances are good, so it holds, but, would prefer to be closer. Despite this, it didn't compromise it.

- Good consistent overall look, contrast could be upped in some areas with the white walls.

- Open windows and exposure was done well to hold the highlights, but it's good to opt for a window sheer when there's a lack of control working with natural sunlight

- Story works

- More tension was needed, and a shot from outside the window would've built on her being trapped both in her fate and physically.

{More variety of shots was originally intended, but due to time restraints and falling behind schedule on both days, we ran out of time and lighting to film. We did manage to squeeze in two ECU's on the character's eyes when Elspeth is pleading with eye contact on the floor to her father; however, as this was lit artificially, in the edit, the shots were unable to be used together, looking very discontinuous even when graded.}

Kate

- Period drama on a budget is challenging. Did a good job finding a location with exposed wood, period furniture, outfits, good ambition, and pulled off.

-Appreciated the crows in the beginning

-Dialogue in a contained location is challenged to stop it from feeling like a play, and does a good job at forcing moments for movement to prevent it from feeling static.

-Disagree with Susan's comment on period dialogue, difficult to write old English as it never is, it should just sound 'oldy worldy' and be easy to follow

-Very good how reverential it was to the history of women in Scotland, gave weight and substance that it was treated with weight and respect

-French Bob threw off, preferred pinning it up, kept falling in her face, making it hard to follow emotions.

- Odd, she skipped upstairs to pray. Couldn't she pray anywhere? {It was so she could go and collect her bible, which was upstairs, providing an opportunity to convey her kid-like naivety and excitement as she believes she stands a chance.}

-wanted the moment she knows she's going to die tomorrow to be held longer for more pause and weight.

- The argument before the slap was too on the nose for dialogue.

- The shot through the window at the end was very wanted to show her trapped.

Zoe

-Very theatrical and challenging to bring to the screen, but good coherence between film and sound.

-Didn't fully feel the distance in the location.

-Dialogue and footsteps at some moments didn't marry/match

-Loved the crows, brought a lot, opening shot to get into the story later on was well done

- Great production design and impressive blood on fingernails, good bruising and costume, door handle was distracting, keep the interior door open to stop the need for going through two - easy not to notice as everything else is so convincing, great location.

- Exterior shot at the end would be good, but wanted in the middle of the film (dinner scene)

-enjoyed dialogue and their interactions, but was distracted by the hair -the line to explain her cutting off her accommodated it and made her look more childlike.

- Appreciated the story being told

-Mentioned the difficulty of the dialogue recording for the stairs, which is an improvement. {Was actually intentional sound design that didn't work.}

Saif - The line' u don't look like her anymore'- good setup, exposition. Good flow and pace overall, hard to pull off, but it works well. Tension at the slap works and feels impactful.

Jamie - Pacing, sound design rises at slap and finds out fate was well done, did a good job of keeping in the story, turning out sound disappearing helped build up work powerfully, done well.

Joe - Poetic, theatrical script, bridging the gap of old time stuff feeling Shakespearean and power blocking for the dynamics could've been pushed more with the power of cinema by close-ups, etc, but overall good performance and colour pallet.

Bea - Ambitious product of period piece, but filmable.

Morven - Power Dynamics in costume- Elspeth Barefoot, in a messy nightgown vs. his regal, finerary, put-together look is very disarming to her character. They were positioned apart, even when face to face, and her off-guard position establishes a difference.

Monica - Good pacing, but I didn't feel like things were cut down to time. Loved production design, but the window blinds took out a bit, but overall didn't care as everything else was great.

Broadcast curse:

Andrew

-Visceral ✨

-Unclear narrative, but don't mind it, good overall aesthetic

-Character perspective is unclear at times.

-Unsure if overlay works

-Flat shot on the couch works, but less so the CU on Phoebe.

Kate

-Good sense of dread and tension.

-VFX are impressive

-Good sense of place through the brilliant set dressing

-Dialogue is sometimes slightly too poetic, e.g., Anabelle's 'drown in thoughts' line.

-Misses and older versions of the script where Harold discovers across the miniature. It would've worked better to connect the two dimensions.}

Zoe

-Right feel for the 90's period. -Good production design.

-Likes that the narrative gets kind of lost. {Symbolic of Phoebe's psyche}

-Compared to the cut she saw before picture lock, she prefers the ambiguity we created, letting viewers form their own slightly more dramatic reasons to explain Phoebe's disconnect. {Originally, in the script, her mental struggles were due to her friends moving away, but after having so much tension built up in the edit, this reveal and long conversation felt quite boring.}

-Missing the touching points between the two worlds.

-Sound design is too full-on at times, which may work against the story. More focus on Phoebe experiencing her journey.

Susan

-Phoebe's breakdown comes across skillfully.

-Fells harmonious as a whole.

-Great VFX

-Merging into TV perspectives was cool.

-Did a lot with such a simple set.

-Orange colour palette adds to the feel and Halloween element. An intelligent way to introduce the supernatural.

-Following two different parties keeps viewers hooked.

Isaac - Thought the Gostchase section felt very real.

Lachlan - Found it upsetting and shared Phoebe's distress. Felt a pit of dread throughout and thought the inside of the TV section was fun!

Fred - Loved it, but noticed the image when inside the TV had to be flipped for the different perspective. {Was originally done with footage in the edit, must have forgotten to recreate after lock in the VFX?}

Anabelle - Slightly biased as in the film, but appreciated the care and effort put into the production. Flo did a fantastic job! The title worked, and the sound carried meaning that we didn't explicitly show. Good comedic moments added to it, had a Wes Anderson feeling.

Thoughts on other films:

• Marsden Rock surprised me, and I didn't expect it to be one of my favourites. I was especially impressed by the colour grade and depths of the shots for such a simplistic story premise with good casting.

• I also found Worms very enjoyable to watch and would love to consume a more extended version of that film.

• Blue Monday was brilliantly executed and felt very cinematic.